Straw Hat nine drabbles
by debbiechan
Summary: Characters: Ishida, Orihime, Matsumoto, Shunsui, Hirako, Hiyori, Ulquiorra, Luppi, Aizen, Ichigo, Grimmjow, Rukia, Tatsuki.Warnings: one drabble contains mild reference to yaoi, another to erotic spanking, another contains specific spoiler for chapter 235


Straw Hat 

by debbiechan

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach; Bleach owns my soul.

Description: Various drabbles written to distract myself from the crisis in the Middle East. The characters and prompts were provided by my f-list on LJ. I tried to weave these together somewhat (like a straw hat, ha ha), but the prompts made it difficult to come up with a theme.

Warnings: Two of these drabbles have references to S-E-X, and one has a specific spoiler for chapter 235, "The Frozen Clutch."

1.

Ishida and Orihime + straw hat

f_or Kaeru-chan_

Most beginners over-worked the project. Stitched pom-poms to the brim or hung tulle from the crown or stuck seashells all over the hatband _or_ (to Ishida's horror) committed all three crimes.

Two third-year girls embroidered elaborate designs onto theirs, but the results were what only grandmothers and questionably sane women would wear. Ishida didn't think much of the tacky starfish pattern he was sewing, but tourists paid his rent--so the tackier the better. He was going to decorate several of the cheap straw hats and sell them at the beach.

When he saw Inoue fashion a pink flower out of gauze and attach it to her hat with six nimble stitches, he knew she was done. That was it. A lesser artist would have tried to add something clever--like yellow threads to resemble stamen or maybe a wide pink dangling band with more flowers--but these excesses didn't even occur to Inoue-san.

She put on the hat and smiled at him.

How to tell her he admired her natural grace?

"It's perfect," Ishida said and hoped that his voice didn't sound too full of awe. "It's a hat someone would actually wear."

"It's for me," Inoue said with a giggle. "I'm outside so much, and my face burns so easily."

Ishida nodded lamely.

He was never outside much at all, except to sell hats, and for once he wished he didn't have to sell the ones he made. If only he could fashion a dozen ways to protect Inoue-san's face. Fine-weave cotton bonnets, a bright-colored boater with a satin band--maybe a cute denim visor with seed pearls applied sparingly.

For her, each would have to be perfect.

2.

Ishida and Matsumoto + awkward

for fieryfaerie86 

Ishida had made it a point not to start conversations with Shinigami, so the question felt awkward. Still, he had to know.

"Is it spring in Soul Society?"

The preponderance of cabbage butterflies made him think so. Another one had just flitted past his head.

Shinigami captains and vice-captains were gathering by the portal to bid the drifters farewell. Attention was centered mostly on Kurosaki, but the unexpectedness of Ishida's question caused several heads to turn in the Quincy's direction.

The ample-bosomed Shinigami exchanged a glance with the captain in the straw hat (was it Captain Kyouraku? Ishida couldn't keep all these characters straight).

"Ah, the season is summer," Straw-hat said. He smiled knowingly.

"But butterflies around here…" Ample-bosom began, and then she looked like she was trying not to laugh.

"Butterflies are more or less metaphorical in Soul Society," said Straw-hat. "They represent transitions. The hell butterflies accompany the dead; the white butterflies…."

"It's only natural that the drifters should be seeing them," said Ample-bosom to Straw-hat. "Can you see white butterflies, Captain?"

"Ah, Matsumoto," said Straw-hat. He tipped his hat as he nodded in no particular direction. "Wherever beautiful women are, there is spring. Whenever a young man's fancy turns to thoughts of love, a cabbage butterfly appears to give him hope."

Ishida frowned. He had no idea what they were talking about.

3.

Hirako and Hiyori + spanking

f_or Quaedam_

Hirako had fallen to all fours after a swift kick to the head from Hiyori.

"Watch the hat," Hirako said, squinting. "You keep making me lose the hat."

"And you _should_ lose it, Dumbass," said Hiyori. "Tweed is for winter and straw is for summer. I'm not even a freaking fashion plate like you are, and _I_ know that." She gave him a kick to the rear end for good measure.

Hirako put his hand on his beloved tweed cap. "It's autumn," he said. "And if you're going to keep smacking me, you need to put on some high heels and fancy panties."

"What the FREAK are you talking about, Shinji?"

Hirako settled his chin on his folded hands and pushed his rear higher into the air. "You don't ever watch the spanking channel?" He smiled a devilish smile. "There's a requisite outfit for this sort of perversion. Garter belts, mini-skirt. Maybe you'd like to wear a black armband?"

"Freak," said Hiyori. "I don't wear shit like that. I wear what I want to wear."

"Exactly."

Hiyori raised her foot and then froze. The two had an unwritten rule about how many times she could sucker-punch Hirako before he'd get fed up and just wander away, annoyed. Hiyori really didn't want to be ignored today.

Instead of kicking, she decided to whap Hiroko's rear with her palm. It was a conciliatory tap--like, "you win, Dumbass," and it wasn't as rough as she usually slammed him.

Hirako closed his eyes and enjoyed it.

4.

Luppi/Ulqui + fascination

f_or Shinigamikender_

Somewhere in Hueco Mundo where the moon cast a lattice of light through a barred window….

High in Aizen's palace, deep in a room that knew no plants, flowers or natural decorations….

Two Arrancar faced one another. Nude. Clothes and weapons in a corner of the stark room.

"I'm El Sexto Espada now," said Luppi, "and with that rank come entitlements. Aizen-sama may invite me to his room. Why shouldn't he?"

"Because …." Ulquiorra glanced at the window bars. Luppi had such an odd sense of style and the only barred window on this floor. The pretentiousness of that, the implicit dare. As if anyone would want to sneak into this pretty Arrancar's quarters to rape him. Ulquiorra had come in through the corridor door, as would other Espada after him.

"Because I will report to Aizen-sama," said Ulquiorra, "that you are a very dull fuck."

Luppi's arms spun, hissing, to their full length and wrapped around Ulquiorra. One finger stroked Ulquiorra's horn. "No you won't. You are a faithful, honest subordinate."

Ulquiorra tilted his head back, closed his eyes. "It takes more than a pretty face to hold Aizen-sama's fascination."

5.

Aizen and Ichigo + "God is Dead"

for andrew jp Aizen imagines that the universe will fall apart like a peasant's straw hat under a relentless monsoon. A new-born God, Aizen will create justice out of injustice, gardens out of broken twigs. 

Ichigo has never believed in blood-type profiles, astrological forecasts, or God. His mother's soul was eaten by a Hollow and is no more. When God is dead, it will not be as if Ichigo hasn't killed him already.

Unlike Aizen, Ichigo doesn't fight for the fate of the universe.

6.

Grimmjow and Rukia + desire

f_or ardane1_

B_ack on, back on. _All Ichigo wanted was for the mask to go back on. No other thought was driving him, no emotion or plan. When Grimmjow's blade impaled Ichigo's hand, the hand that had been clawing to put the mask _back on_, Ichigo's fingers were still reaching and there was no pain.

The pain began to return when he saw Rukia. Her eyes--heavy-lidded and full of cool purpose. Her small mouth speaking an incantation.

J_ust like in the beginning, she saved my life._

Ichigo was about berate his own weakness, fight back lessons he didn't want to learn when the monster's hand caught Rukia's face.

The desire to save her shouted, _"Rukia!"_ Pain exploded against his eyes, cheeks, and jaw.

7.

Rukia and Orihime + ice

f_or Incandescens_

Rukia was the type of girl to take charge. Orihime, never a leader but never a follower, was not comfortable training with her at first. Sado-kun had been a simpler partner, doing his own thing and allowing Orihime to do hers.

"Will you look at me?" Rukia shouted one day. "Right before you fire Tsubaki, you have to look hard, feel crazy, and think _I have a good reason to knock down this target_. C'mon on, Orihime, show me some _hate_ in that attack."

For one raging second, Orihime, eyes narrowing, thought: _Please! Enough! You're telling me what to do too much!_

"You're too nice," Rukia sighed. "Ichigo was always so much easier to piss off."

Orihime's shot went sailing. Rukia threw up a ray of blue energy--it crystallized, and Tsubaki cut through the ice.

"See!" Rukia cheered. "You're stronger than me!"

W_ow._ Orihime felt immediately intimidated. _So that's why Kurosaki-kun loves you._

8.

Ichigo and Tatsuki + propose

f_or Cal Reflector_

Evening classes like ballroom dancing and Western line dancing are being taught at the dojo this summer. It's the day that Ichigo has decided to quit karate for good. He shows up to return his uniform and is surprised as heck to see Tatsuki wearing a red bandana and a cowboy hat.

"No way."

She gives him a sour look. "I said I'd help out with the younger kids," she says. "Sempai teaches the main class, and I just keep the five-year-olds busy. What are you doing here?"

They exchange a look. Tatsuki notices his gym bag.

"Well, I knew you were going to quit. You're leagues better than anyone here, and it would just be a waste of your time to keep coming to this baby dojo."

"Yeah." Ichigo manages a half-smile and walks into the building. "See ya later."

They will spar again of course. One last time. Tatsuki's eyes will issue the challenge, and he will drop into a stance and go "What are you waiting for? A marriage proposal?"

After he defeats her, easily, good-naturedly, with no recognition of the significance of the event at all, Tatsuki will think:

H_e is unbeatable. His spirit, his soul is different. I bet that makes him lonely_. _Ichigo …will we ever be friends again like we used to be?_

9.

Ishida Uryuu and Tatsuki + unsuspected

f_or enychan_

"Inoue-san! Inoue-san!" The voice is breathless, too breathless for someone merely dashing out of a room. "You forgot your straw hat!"

Tatsuki and Orihime turn to see Ishida, unusually flushed and sweet-eyed, holding Orihime's afternoon handicrafts club project in his hand.

Tatsuki takes a step forward. She always keeps an eye peeled for boys who might "accidentally" bump into Orihime's breasts.

Of all Karakura high-schoolers, though, Ishida is the boy most unsuspected of hormonal motives. He never flirts. He isn't even nice to girls. Hell, he isn't nice to anybody.

"Oh thank you, Ishida-kun," Orihime says, taking the hat.

"It's a very sunny summer afternoon," Ishida says in a very odd voice. Is he trying to make conversation? "You wouldn't want your cheeks to get burned."

One corner of Tatsuki's mouth rises in a sad smile.

A_nother one bites the dust._

E_ND_

Thank you to faithful beta Finnigan Geist.


End file.
